The Loneliest Firsts
The longest road I’ve takenisn’t the roadI ever wanted to take.Having to drive to the cemeterywhen I want to talkrenders me speechless.I first realized my life would never be the same when I woke up...came downstairs...didn’t see you on the couch...didn’t hear you say good morning...didn’t know how the plants were doing until I checked on them myself.The second first came when I wanted potatoes...
My dearest brother
Farewell I said with tears falling like rain drops Holding your hand as you drew your last breathIt has been years since we said our goodbyeAnd yet the days feel like eternity Goodnight my dearest brotherUntil we meet again
La douleur
My heart aches with the emptiness I hold for you. This temporary idea of life, makes me want to snatch away every drop of breath and lock it away in a jar. The hollowness of this unusual feeling keeps me up at night. I wonder if only someone came back from the dead to confirm what death is all about – If we could finally grasp the idea of it and proceed with the grief.– Shey. A
Grief
It started with my mouth,Whose corners went slack,Who wanted to call them liarWho wanted to argue back.It spread into my throat, Which started to close up.I thought that I’d be sick, I wanted to throw up.Next into my chest, Where I felt a squeeze Then into my lungs,I felt I couldn’t breath.Then into my stomach,It twisted and it turned.And Into to my eyes,Which started to burn.Then into the floo...
First Loss
It started with my mouth,Whose corners went slack,Who wanted to call them liarWho wanted to argue back.It spread into my throat, Which started to close up.I thought that I’d be sick, I wanted to throw up.Next into my chest, Where I felt a squeeze Then into my lungs,I felt I couldn’t breath.Then into my stomach,It twisted and it turned.And Into to my eyes,Which started to burn.Then into the floo...
For Nuka
It feels like I'm coming homeWith the three gulls overheadFlying into the horizon In this intangible space It feels like I'm to be born anew once more But the broken part of me Desperately needs something physical to cling to In the coming days without you So I cry into the seaDemanding to know why you were taken from me And I try to bury my heart in the sandWith the waves of grief crashing ove...
Sailor Heart of a Disposable Camera
On the sixth day after family foundyou waterloggedthe rest of us wolvesdispersed their findings and you sankinto the sky againThe peeping-glass window bobs above whitecapsto beckon a plea. Schools of constellations swimlike the fish you watched in sinkinglight, twinkle under powderedyouth gunmetal grey they migrate South into mist brave...
Grieving for a monster
Book: A Mother’s Reckoning by Sue Klebold. Prefaced to this book is the following;‘On April 20, 1999, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold armed themselves with guns and explosives and walked into Columbine High School. They killed twelve students and a teacher, before taking their own lives. It was the worst school shooting in history.Dylan Klebold was my son.’This book is one mother’s dedication to ...
Grieving for a monster
Prefaced to this book is the following;‘On April 20, 1999, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold armed themselves with guns and explosives and walked into Columbine High School. They killed twelve students and a teacher, before taking their own lives. It was the worst school shooting in history.Dylan Klebold was my son.’This book is one mother’s dedication to trying to comprehend the one of the most t...
Ocean Love
This shadow left between us hereIs a brittle thing my loveSo bring your lightThat we might break it downYou were only with us for a momentBut inside of that short time We saw eternity rise and swellThe ebb and flowOf an ocean of moments, stretching up and singing this soft, luxurious love song to timeWe are what you no longer contain;These memories that sit, and floatThrough time, and space, a...
The Lamb
There is no timeI am displacedNo explanationOnly disgraceThere's no solutionI'm cut in twoAlmost betrothedBut not to youFulfilment goneNo grand planSacrificial cutsA tasty young lamb