wanting to end it all butfighting to learn my purposetired of this lifenot being understoodwell, what is why purposedo i have oneseems like i don’t in these times who’s really therenot one soullonely i’ve been feelingthe person i go to the most don’t wanna burden i call on God is he still there maybe i’m not listening hard enoughwhy must i wait so long deep inside i can’t seem to feel this pain...

It’s an unknown pleasure that makes one show their lowest traits, and an unfamiliar fear that puts out highly regarded manners on display.The sun is going down - giving a red light to the up going curve on my lips until darkness entirely blocks it out. The subtly sparkling static stars make this melancholic time seem never ending when both left and right appear to be dark.              They mak...

I stared at an old photo of my father and I. He and I sat down together on the couch happily with bright smiles. I love my father and he loves me. You see, my parents have five kids. Jessie, Julia, Jasmin, Jasper and lastly me, Julius, their only son. So, of course he and I have a strong connection. He’d always take me out to watch movies with him, play catch, eat out, and all that ordinary Ame...

ALEXANDER  KAN AN  INVISIBLE  ISLAND The Korean Diaspora of the CIS of 21-th century: An essay on the artistic mastering of a marginal consciousness (Translated by Steven Lee, Stanford University, USA) A great rejection               As one still remembers: a plastic being of the Soviet man was always in the fact that he clasped in his own hands something very narrow, limited in dimension...

Confession of a 42-Year-Old Writer: From a Literature of Frustration to the Literature of Overcoming    Alexandr Kan As with people, objects oftentimes become sources that arouse particular memory of one’s past. Strangely, though, objects seem to hold still the past, present, and future of a person, unlike memory of people which is subject to constant change. I tend to treat all my personal b...

A THIRD HAMLET (World Diasporas of the 21st Century: The Experience of the Literary Formation of a Marginal Hero) Alexander Kan (Translated by Steven Sunwoo Lee, Stanford Universiry) Our topic requires a quick overview of the problem.  Therefore allow me to begin my paper on the literature of Koreans of the CIS with an excerpt from one of my own essays, “The Origin of the Phantom” (1995). T...

Yesterday I was illegalToday I am essentialYesterday I was a foreign invaderToday I am a savior Yesterday I was the problemToday I am the solutionYesterday I was overlookedToday I look over youYesterday you declined my callToday I answer yoursYesterday I was unwanted, denied and turned awayToday I am invited to the front linesYesterday you hated meBut today you need meToday you see meToday you ...

We like to call them ‘trying times’, but perhaps we will look back on them one day and call them something else. If you look hard enough, this is a time of hope. Look around you, find beauty in human response; in fear, in kindness, in survival. It’s easy to get swept up in the wave of panic and fear but the current slows with every good deed. There is  poetry in human kindness.  The neighbours ...

I’ve been at the bottom of the valley With the dirt loose as dust I’ve been at the top of the climb When no feeling’s enough I’ve been lost in the darknessWith my hands on my eyes I’ve been blinded by light And only wanted to cry I’ve had my feet on the ledgeWith my heart screaming out I’ve been walking to bed Just to fall and break down I’ve been falling apart When my life’s made of gold I’ve ...

There once was a garden that the whole world forgot It was left just to grow, first to live then to rot It glowed golden in summer through the leaves of the trees But the sun never saw what was torn underneath Under foot, under root, the whole garden was breaking With each day gone unseen every atom was aching Through the earth and the water ran away a disease That cut deeper and faster with ea...

We're the midnight daydreamers Leaving trails in the skyThe downtrodden believers Quick to fall for a lie But hold on for tomorrow Take a risk for the light Learn to grow from the sorrow Like the day from the night 

If the internet was a city, TikTok is a funhouse of trick mirrors and trap doors. It reflects your interests back to you until you are forced deeper and deeper into its content. A maze of memes, if you will. However, traverse its labyrinthine corridors for long enough, you will come across a quiet corner of this funhouse. It’s gloomily lit, and, in accordance with the dark academia lore from ...