I’m up.
Of course I’m up because I’m always up. But then again it’s because I’m always down.
When I’m up I’m up. Can’t sleep because I’m anxious so I’m tired and I’m up.
Smoke because I’m upset I’m up.
School and work wake me up.
And life keeps me up.
I’m not a ballon filled with helium
Just up
But then again I am down.
Everything is to slow or hard to get
Like I’m falling into a deep hole
Mad because someone pushed me and left me there falling
Crying because no one is seeing me disappear into darkness
I’m to scared to hit the ground
So I close my eyes as if the darkness wasn’t around me
After I was up now I’m down
The hole so deep I continue to fall
Keeping my eyes closed for so long I dose off
And to wake up with my alarm ringing
Now I’m up starting the repeat of an up down day.
A year later I’m still up…
Good news is I’m healing but I’m still up
I like to spend my time outside in a daze staring at the trees
I wave to them and they wave back letting me know that are up too
I still cry to the trees when moon is out
I have a beautiful mate whose soul is pure, open, and light; a definite reflection of mine.
But I still Mourn my old self and the would ofs and could ofs