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[YOU HAVE ONE NEW VOICE MESSAGE]
[NEW MESSAGE]
Well…uh…let’s see if I know how to work this properly. Okay…uh…here we go, I guess. Okay…Dear [INSERT], if you are listening to this message, then you have successfully, for once, opened and listened to your voicemails. Finally! Now I’m getting off track…well you see, I have gotten myself in a bit a trouble, so I’m somewhat hoping that you’ve received this message somehow…since this is the only way I can send this at this point. And excuse my manners, you must be very confused right now! I mean…you are currently standing over my body with your…how did you say it…uh…associate! Yes, associate! And I’m just trying to figure out why you pulled out your phone this one time to check your messages while your friend is finishing up the job of digging out my grave. Such a fascinating inquiry! Oh…and I see that you are slightly walking away from me, so your “associate” doesn’t get too concerned, though I imagine that when you stormed off that it piqued their interest just a bit. And now you’ve walked away far enough that you don’t hear your “associate” digging my grave. Huh! Must have finished. Or maybe I got up from the ground and put your “associate” friend inside of my grave! MY GRAVE! Now wouldn’t that be a horrific hoot? Now…wouldn’t it also be a miraculous feat if I was headed your way…right…now…well, wouldn’t that be something for the books? And if I was following you, then I would imagine that I would be seeing you start to pick up your pace a bit…not even caring about your “associate” or the crime you committed. And…OH…well, geez…it seems as if you have fallen into…well, would you look at this…ANOTHER EMPTY GRAVE! Well, what are the odds of that happening? Is it merely coincidence…or did a certain “someone” come the day before you and your “associate” so unfortunately murdered me so I could execute a better plan than yours? You know…I’m still trying to understand how you young folk still hold on to your phones as if…well…as if they were your own lives! Well…maybe they are…and if they are…than I believe yours is about to run out of battery…OH, LOOK! It seems as if I have caught up to you! I’VE FOUND YOU! And…OH, LOOK WHAT WE HAVE HERE! Well…geez, it seems to be a wagon full of dirt…which may just be the perfect amount to cover you up, and a perfectly functional shovel to pat it all down. Ah, geez, I didn’t mean to make you cry, so let me sing you a lullaby as you are sadly about to die…and…
[TO REPLAY THIS MESSAGE, PRESS 1]
[TO DELETE THIS MESSAGE, PRESS 7]
[THERE ARE NO NEW MESSAGES]
BEEP...
[YOU HAVE ONE NEW VOICE MESSAGE]
[NEW MESSAGE]
Well…uh…let’s see if I know how to work this properly. Okay…uh…here we go, I guess. Okay…Dear [INSERT], if you are listening to this message, then you have successfully, for once, opened and listened to your voicemails. Finally! Now I’m getting off track…well you see, I have gotten myself in a bit a trouble, so I’m somewhat hoping that you’ve received this message somehow…since this is the only way I can send this at this point. And excuse my manners, you must be very confused right now! I mean…you are currently standing over my body with your…how did you say it…uh…associate! Yes, associate! And I’m just trying to figure out why you pulled out your phone this one time to check your messages while your friend is finishing up the job of digging out my grave. Such a fascinating inquiry! Oh…and I see that you are slightly walking away from me, so your “associate” doesn’t get too concerned, though I imagine that when you stormed off that it piqued their interest just a bit. And now you’ve walked away far enough that you don’t hear your “associate” digging my grave. Huh! Must have finished. Or maybe I got up from the ground and put your “associate” friend inside of my grave! MY GRAVE! Now wouldn’t that be a horrific hoot? Now…wouldn’t it also be a miraculous feat if I was headed your way…right…now…well, wouldn’t that be something for the books? And if I was following you, then I would imagine that I would be seeing you start to pick up your pace a bit…not even caring about your “associate” or the crime you committed. And…OH…well, geez…it seems as if you have fallen into…well, would you look at this…ANOTHER EMPTY GRAVE! Well, what are the odds of that happening? Is it merely coincidence…or did a certain “someone” come the day before you and your “associate” so unfortunately murdered me so I could execute a better plan than yours? You know…I’m still trying to understand how you young folk still hold on to your phones as if…well…as if they were your own lives! Well…maybe they are…and if they are…than I believe yours is about to run out of battery…OH, LOOK! It seems as if I have caught up to you! I’VE FOUND YOU! And…OH, LOOK WHAT WE HAVE HERE! Well…geez, it seems to be a wagon full of dirt…which may just be the perfect amount to cover you up, and a perfectly functional shovel to pat it all down. Ah, geez, I didn’t mean to make you cry, so let me sing you a lullaby as you are sadly about to die…and…
[TO REPLAY THIS MESSAGE, PRESS 1]
[TO DELETE THIS MESSAGE, PRESS 7]
[THERE ARE NO NEW MESSAGES]
BEEP...
