He told me not to go in too deep
Or else the waves would sweep me away
But there was no satisfaction with just my knees
So I allowed the waves to carry me further in.
Small foam bubbled at my stomach
Whilst salt caught on my lips and tongue
I tasted the sea and all its offerings
And felt the way it wanted me to belong
His voice sounded quiet underneath the sea
But the only voice I needed to hear was my own
With birdsongs and cold hands
I felt complacent in myself in places where I didn’t belong.
I couldn’t see the fish through the haze
But I knew they were swimming with ecstasy
And all of their tails where pushing
Because nothing ever stood still in a void so alive.
The sand laid waiting and patiently looked at me
All of its eyes seeing me above them
And had arms no bigger than those it wanted
But its embrace felt like all I ever wanted and forever more.
I could see him emerge from the shore
Peach against blue and iridescence
But I would have been glad if he never came back
And left me to sink until the end seemed not so distant.
The remains of the sea clung to me as he forced me to escape
And you couldn’t tell the water from the sweat
And those moments before they were dried off
Reminded me of everything I could have been but wasn’t.
Monday brought the sea in the clouds
And tears of the sky falling onto cement
Dry sand turned heavy with moisture
And it felt familiar underneath my footsteps.
If I closed my eyes I’d be there and he’d be here
Calling my name and watching me drift away
But I didn’t know he’d be the one to float away
And he wouldn’t be there to call my name anymore.
