The fear to...

I used to be afraid to love
And putting my heart on the line
It was not the commitment 
Or the chance of rejection and being left alone that worried me
It was loving the wrong person 
And falling in too deep
It was wondering if I would learn to love myself
While I loved you
It was the fear that you would not love me
As I loved you

The fear is still present
Yet, suppressed
Hidden by daydreams of road trips and adventures
Covered by hopes for jam sessions to our favorite songs
Drowned in aspirations of spending all day playing basketball together
Or all night watching movies

The gentle dreams of what we could be 
I imagine so much joy
And laughter 
And love

But I can only imagine what it would be like to love you fully
To fall in uncontrollably
To be with you endlessly
Despite my fear
Worry 
And doubt
I'm not afraid to love you
To be your everything
To make you my world
You took my fear
And for that I am grateful
For that I am thankful
And for that
I love you
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